It may seem odd to have a chapter heading on the "soul" within a stress management  book. We rarely look to spiritual or religious sources for answers to the questions of our  dairy stress. Our society tends to separate the spiritual from the secular, perhaps to the  disadvantage of both. While this chapter is not designed to either advocate or reject  participation in formal religion, it is important to look at that p art of ourselves which goes far beyond the tangible reaches of science-the soul.

        If one can judge the public mood from looking at what sells in the lo cal bookstore, then  I am not alone in thinking that concerns of the soul are important. Books such as Care  of the Soul  by Thomas Moore are on the best-seller list. "New Age "book stores sell a  variety of works dealing with the spiritual aspects of life. There is hunger for this type  of information, despite (or perhaps because of) the overly secularized nature of our culture.

        The underlying premise of this chapter is that the soul is important, and that effective  stress management requires that attention be paid to the needs of the spirit as well  as the body. Or, in the words of Thomas Mo ore, "the soul needs an intense, full-bodied  spiritual life as much as and the same way that the body needs food" [Care of the Soul:  A Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life. (New York: Harper Perennial, 1992), 228].

        We have seen that modern research into psychoneuroimmunology has  demonstrated the connection between mind and body. What the mind thinks or images,  the body reflects. There is no reason to ignore the potential contribution which spiritual  health can make to overall wellness. Throughout history, men and women have been  able to withstand incredible trials and pursue heroic causes if they have been  strengthened by a spiritual conviction and faith. Unbelievable levels of stress may become more tolerable if you have faith in a broader plan, or if you can draw upon  another level of support and comfort.

      As with all facets of stress management, the first step is to look inward. 

"Soul Talk"

Self-Assessment
         Sit down with pen and paper, and prepare to spend a few minutes thinking  about the soul, and how stress and spirituality interact in your life. 

What is the soul? How do you define it for yourself? 
 _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ 
What does spirituality mean to you?
 _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ 
When you are feeling 'stressed-out' at home or at work, do you turn to meditation  or spiritual activities for comfort? If so, what kind of activities? _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________ 

         Each of us comes from a very different spiritual "place." Whether we attend church  or not, whether our parents followed a specific tradition-none of that matters here.  What does matter is that we recognize that there is something within us which does not fit neatly into the mind-body package. There is a part of us which is of a spiritual  nature; a part which cannot be ignored. The challenge is to nurture that core in such  a way that is comfortable for us.

         What activities do you participate in when you feel like you need a "lift" or "retreat"?  Many people take a walk or run. Getting out into nature is an excellent way to refresh  and renew the spirit. The spirit, the soul, needs beauty-what could be better than sitting  under a tree looking up at the sky?

         When we are under stress and very busy, it is easy to let beauty slip away from our  daily lives. We work in office buildings or hospitals with artificial light and fake plants,  we eat canned food, we don't hear the birds because of the freeway noise. Beauty is  lost; and with it, some of our spiritual health is depleted.

         Many people find comfort in prayer or meditation. But if you are in a hurry, and have  family and job pressures, who has time to sit and pray for 20 minutes?

         Moore tells us that we need to care for our souls, but how? He continues saying Care  of the soul is not a project of self-improvement nor a way of being released from  the troubles and pains of human existence.... Care of the soul touches another  dimension, in no way separate from life, but not identical either with the problem  solving that occupies so much of our consciousness. We care for the soul solely by honoring its expressions, by giving it time and opportunity to reveal it self and by living  life in away that fosters the depth, interiority, and quality in which it flourishes. Soul is its  own purpose and end... .We know soul is being cared for when our pleasures feel  deeper than usual, when we can let go of the need to be free of complexity and  confusion, and when compassion takes the place of distrust and fear. 

[Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul, 304] 

         Given this perspective, is not the care of the soul a vital part of stress management?  Is it not part of your commitment to achieving a higher level of wellness? 

Giving Yourself the Gift of Caring for the Soul
           We may be very conscientious about getting enough exercise and vitamins during  times of stress, yet may feel strangely "drained" and empty inside. This may reflect  the fact that we have not paid enough attention to the needs of the spirit or soul.  Soul is that depth or quality deep within us which helps to give our lives meaning.  Each of us expresses this aspect of ourselves differently. Once again referring to  Thomas Moore, "we can't care for the soul unless we are familiar with its ways"  [Care of the Soul ]. This means that we need to observe how we are doing by  looking at some of the simple things: Are we having any unusual dreams? Troubling  moods? Self-destructive behaviors? Or in the positive sense, are we finding the need  for quality time with ourselves, spent perhaps in contemplation or immersed in nature?  These may be 'symptoms' for which the soul needs nourishment.

           For myself, I become aware of "soul hunger" when I start to feel empty inside and  lose my enthusiasm for whatever I am doing in my life overall. I often look to the spiritual  to help this malaise, whether that means walking in the rose garden or spending a  day on spiritual retreat. The solutions you  find will be exclusively yours; treasure them.

           Caring for your soul is at treasure-a gift to yourself to make you more fully human.  Care of the soul means observing its ways of expression, and accepting yourself for who  and where you are, accepting the idiosyncrasies as part of the sacredness of each  individual  and each life. Caring for the soul, just as any other facet of wellness, takes  time and commitment to your self or to the person whom you are trying to assist. Once  again, the care plan model comes in handy. 

Drawing a Care Plan for the Soul  
           The ideas I am going to share with you in this section have grown out of both my  research into the topic and my own experience. Some or all of this may not work  for your that's OK. Use this information as a starting point for creating your own plan.  Remember, you are committing to your own worth and value as a spiritual being.  Whether you follow any particular religious creed does not matter; each of us has  a spirit and a soul in need of care. Listen to these needs as you strive for higher  levels of wellness. 

Step I :            Acknowledge the Sacredness of Everyday Life There have been a variety of books and articles within the literature of women's  studies which talk of the sacredness of our everyday life and activities. At first  glance, this may seem ludicrous: how can going to work be sacred? The key to  this philosophy is that you focus on being in the moment, and recognize the  contribution you are making to the broader picture of the world around you. If you  are a health care worker, this may not seem too unusual. But what if you operate  a bulldozer for a living? If you do your job well, with a high degree of intention and  commitment, it can then become an act of grace because that is what you have brought  to it. Washing dishes can become a sacred activity once you accept the perspective  of being in the moment, and being intent on whatever you are doing. If you are doing  something which makes the world a better place-even in the tiniest way-that is  sacred. Acknowledge the importance of what ever you do. Acknowledge your own value. 

Step II:          Create a Special Place for Yourself One of the important facets of any religious practice is the creation of sacred sp ace.  Even if you do not believe in any religion, you can create a sacred space for yourself- a place that is yours, that holds some small, meaningful 'treasures,' a place that feels  refreshing to you. I have several such places. I work at a facility which has many acres  of beautiful gardens and trees; certain corners of that campus are special to me and  help to refresh me when I am feeling in need of food for my soul. In my home, I have  a little corner with some porcelain figurines which I got as a child. That corner makes  me feel better. Other people may want totally different types of special places; be  creative! See what works for you or your client. 

Step III:            Designate Some "Soul Time" Every Day This is the hardest part. Very few of us have extra time to spend on anything; trying  to schedule time for stress management activities may put yet another stressor on  us! The key here is to start small: five-maybe ten-minutes a day to just be with yourself.  Lean against a tree, sleep, look at a pretty picture, pray, chant, whatever. Just do  something that feels restorative to your spirit. If you miss a day or so, don't get hung  p with guilt. Doing what you can, to the best that you can for where you are is enough.  The biggest thing is to try. 

Step IV:            Cultivate Beauty Around You Whenever Possible This is often a challenge in urban life, but it can be done. I five within a major metropolitan  area, yet have been able to construct some beauty and wilderness around my house by  planting some flowers in a window pot, hanging out a bird feeder, and using potpourri in  some of the rooms. Simple, inexpensive steps which really do help. In my cubicle at work,  I have some photos of my family, a few special greeting cards, a pretty bowl with tea bags  in it, and a nice pen-not much, but it helps the desk feel like "my space."

         Music can also be very important to feeding and caring for the soul. The chapter on  music explains this in more detail, but most of us know that certain types of music will soothe  and uplift us when we are feeling burned-out. Use that healing quality of sound to help  you in your stress management activities.

         We could go on and on with other ideas for how to care for the soul, but this gives you  an idea of some fairly simple interventions which you can do. Take some time now to  start writing your "Soul Care Plan." It will evolve as your needs and ideas change-that's  OK. The act of starting is a major gift to yourself, and to your own wellness. 

My Care Plan:  

Begin by filling in the following blanks: 
I spend my day doing ____________________________________________________________. 
This helps make the world better because ___________________________________________. _______________________________________________________________________________. 
My special place is/will be_________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________. 
It is special or sacred because_____________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________.  
I will set aside__________________________ time per day to do activities which will help to address my spiritual needs _______________ _______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________ Learning how to manage stress is an important part of my overall commitment to  wellness. Taking care of my soul is an important part of this program for me because _______________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________.